There's a tradition in the Perry family that we were always against slavery. That much goes without saying, doesn't it. And I know that my father and my grandfather disregarded "the color line" before that became fashionable. That might not be so clear cut: it could be that so few people could put up with us that it didn't matter what color they were. Along those same lines, what matters about somebody's hand is that it's not pointing a weapon at you, not the color of the skin on the hand. White people have been harming other white people for millennia longer than the concept "white people" existed.
And I know that for generations there have been people that took exception to us, for example my grandfather was run out of West Virginia for being a "pervert." We've thought about our history of being (as we see it) persecuted, and we decided for our own reasons to not get racist. For my grandfather it was that he couldn't afford to make such distinctions, and for my dad it was he got so damn tired of being told to.
So he took our family not to the little white United Methodist church across the street, but the almost all black, older and more magnificent, UM church across town. At Liberty Heights & Garrison. In 1969 to 1971 that I know of. And then we moved and started going to Elderslie UM church at Pimlico & Ken Oak, a "changing" UM church in that "changing" neighborhood, and stayed members literally till they died. As that church absorbed the members of what had been that neighborhood's UM black church, and as younger and/or more liberal whites started coming. They even had a minister who was what amounted to a social democrat, as in the UK's Labour Party.
So before long all the bigots and conservatives left. And when the black population in the neighborhood increased so it did in that church. It got to the point where my mother was most likely the last white member of that congregation, and the black minister and a few "sisters" from the church who came to the nursing home to give her communion I think once a month were all black for several years.
In my father's case it's because he was a good person, basically. He was the kind of Christian that MAGA hates. Unlike my outcast grandfather he could afford to make racial distinctions, but he was against the idea. And he stuck to it, even when people called him crazy and/or "liberal" for it.
In my case it's that I really had no choice, and now I'm glad that happened, because racism is bullshit. I started going to white neighborhood schools in the white neighborhoods we lived in, but the school in the "changing" neighborhood was "changing" too. So I got to see that black, white, and sometimes Jews (who had recently become white), could make fun of my mother's cerebral palsy to and my father's spinal curvature at me like "your mother's a retarded monkey" and "your dad escaped Notre Dame." I had an "equal opportunity" approach to that problem, I'd hate them without regard to their color. That doesn't matter when you bully a smaller boy about his physically handicapped parents. You don't get a pass no matter what your skin is like.
Then because my Bad Attitude got me adjudicated as a Child In Need of Supervision I was locked up in the state institution for "bad" children whose families could not afford lawyers to save them, which in Baltimore City in 1972 meant that most of us were black. It was in the Richards and Finesinger buildings in Rosewood State Hospital, but it was somehow separate from that, even if only in theory. In the two dorms on our end of the building there were four rooms of eight beds each, and of 32 occupants only 6 of us were white.
And most of us didn't like each other, although some did give up butt to the guys, mostly other white ones, because we were like cranky bonobos that couldn't be all by ourselves. That seemed to be the case regardless of our color. (Look up bonobos' social behavior.) So how someone treated you mattered more than their color, and although most of the energetic boys would join together to bother me regardless of their color the boys in my dorm who were nice to me and took up for me were black. And they didn't get bribed for it either, they just decided I was human, even if I was white. (In Baltimore in 1972, mind you.)
So as I said the obvious fact that racism is bullshit was literally beaten into my head and stuffed up my butt. People basically suck, so if I limit myself to only a particular kind of person I lose out on the opportunity to find good things I don't usually get from people my own color. Decent black people (from my perspective) aren't any more numerous that decent white people, but the races aren't evenly distributed. In Baltimore the demographic has gone from 80.6% white in 1940 to only 31.9% white in 2020, and most of those whites are upper-middle class who live along Charles and St Paul Street (and a few parallel streets and all cross streets) north of Johns Hopkins University, who usually send their kids to mostly white private schools in the area. And most of that class has always abhorred or at least avoided me, except for a few young women who over the years decided to toy with my affections and/or use me for my body (mostly the former, unfortunately.) So it matters more that here in Lexington KY it's mostly black people who are nice to me: they might have to be nice for some white people, but they sure don't have to be nice to my crazy ass. It's sometimes more comforting when people do things that are not to their advantage. We call such people "saints." Oh. FYI. I've always attracted disaffected lesbians, though usually not in the (more frequent) way than they attract me, and when those friendships fuck up it's sometimes my fault. Then there's the the one who didn't believe me when I said I know she's a lesbian and I'm never getting any but that's simply not important to me: if I get to like her as a person and to enjoy having a futile crush on her and she becomes part of my life that's good enough. I was not laying in wait for a moment of weakness, and I would never roofie her. But she simply had problems believing me, perhaps because she and her girlfriend were coke & booze whores for a few rich boys, and eventually she just decided against the evidence that I was evil. Which probably had more to do with getting dumped by that girlfriend, probably to a rich boy, and eventually getting to a point where she didn't need rich boys more, than it had to do with me. If she didn't need rich boys, she certainly didn't need poor ones. To bring it back to the main topic this girl was white, but I've also had situations that got sexual with black lesbians who usually avoided men of any color, that ended because I was nuts. So that too eventually balances out.
But anyway. Here in Lexington KY it's 66.76 "white alone" as of 2030, but roughly 3/5 of the people who'll talk to me, mostly of my class level, number among the 14.73 "black alone" folks. And Hispanics are 9.2% of the population, but most Hispanic guys will talk to me, though I often have to talk first. In English, to let them know my deficiency. (If I can't speak your language it's not *your* problem, an attitude that was also passed down to me.) Luckily most people don't bother me here, but most who do are white people who think they outrank me. And they're usually pretty openly racist too.
So I come from good stock. My grandfather was a factory-working "pervert," my father was a crazy crippled man, and I -- if I can't be the messiah then I'll be a very naughty boy. And we've always been anti-racist, and other people's "fine distinctions" don't impress us much. Basically if you can put up with us we'll love you for it. Whoever you are. It just feels obvious. And in my history I've had reason to venture father outside the socially normal than most other people I've known, because my father was Quasimodo, my mother was a Retarded Monkey, and I am a Mutant Freak From Outer Space. What it's come down to is that you can't be too picky when you're a minority of one, so low has my lineage fallen. So I never extended it further: in my Y-chromosomal line the babies stop here. With me. One thing I have saved you from is whoever my child would have been, of which sex and/or whatever racial mixture. I've had sex with women of many races, but I've made a baby with none of them. And if I had a son you'd do well to beware, though if I had a daughter it would be fitting to bow down.
See the progression? From "pervert" to "cripple" to "semi-intellectual lunatic." What could possibly come next? How would a failed messiah train his offspring? First off, learn a martial art. You'll need it. Many times. Secondly suck up to the "intellectual elite" -- especially the "progressive" ones -- and inspire them to make themselves useful. And third, always want to stick up for The Underdog but be careful about whether it's called for: e.g., pedophile cannibals are very "misunderstood," but then there might be good reason for that. Fourth, trust no one without hard proof; not even committing a murder together will make you stay friends. (At least not in the movies I watch, I know so few out-of-the-closet homicidal felons.) And, mainly, Take No Shit. Refuse to cowed. Do what must be done even when it's scary. Be as close to a ninja as you can be. (An android ninja would do better, but let's not get too picky.)
You would not want to cross one of my offspring. I'd've made sure of that. If you let them live until they were 9, I mean; it's not just the genes at work here. Once s/he reached the age of reason she'd see what our line is up against, and s/he would get pissed off. It'll never happen because we don't do that here, but picture an avowed leftist shooting up a MAGA occasion. In my early teens I decided that any kid of mine would be like that, so you should be glad I have a decided that was wrong. That rather than "not hide" my assault weapon from my troubled teenager well enough, I simply decided not to reproduce. You people owe me for that. I think of SSI as reparations. Signing up to try to get on it amounted to suing for damages: some medical experts had to decide several times that I had been badly fucked over in the head. And they might've been among the people who were persecuting me. Because what would you do without David Fucking Perry to kick around anymore? To repeat: be glad I didn't have any kids. When personal pride (including taking pride in our politics) outweighs the desire to be a good person you're likely to see what it means when that happens, and when you drive someone like that to decide you should not be here it's your own damn fault. Imagine me as a mass shooter's daddy: I had thirty years where I chose not to do that. See how many kids and maybe grandkids did I decided not to have? Like I said, you fuckers owe me. You got lucky when the men I used to share women's attentions with wanted to reproduce: I didn't, so I got dumped for them. One of these guys even moved to Australia to reproduce with a woman who was probably "too good" for me; another did the deed of reproducing more intimately. (The last time I "french" kissed her was when she was pregnant with his fetus, in his place with him watching, and he decided not to bother getting bothered about that, at least not then.) If I'd wanted to build a weapon against "society" I had several opportunities. And there was a good chance s/he would turn up racially mixed, with mothers who were white rednecks, or suburban Jews, or immigrant Chinese From Taiwan (i.e. not Chinese-Chinese but not an ABC), or working class and black, or a Hispanic hookers, or smart weirdos of any noted demographic.
The main thing these potential mothers had in common was having sex with me, but they were also "abnormal" in one way or another. And chances are that anybody with some kind of positive relationship with me might have a bad attitude toward normal people. If I had anything to do with it they would, that's an important criterion. Normal people are best used as food and fertilizer, ideally speaking. "Blood will out." And bloodthirstiness, though usually indirectly, is one of our society's prime norms. Normies make sure that anyone with a conscience despises them, the problem is that it's hard to predict whether the conscience or the hatred will be the stronger factor in any future generation of Perrys. I'd lean harder on the "hate them" part, but them I'm weird that way. And I've spent too much time being too conscience-stricken. Consciences are for losers, as "all the world" sees it. That there's my problem: I'm such a good person.
Y'all owe me for that. And if you think you don't, you probably bow to MAGA (if you're not in on it). Those who admit their debt should see why that's the better choice: do you want those people to have, or to take away from you, what I ask you to give to me? I might be annoyingly nuts, but those people are dangerous. As grownups, some with important positions. I, for all my blathering, have no power over you, nor do I want any: I simply want to keep on being my mostly harmless loony self. I want only good things for most of you, because my livelihood depends on your taxes. And now Elon Musk would like to get rid of people like me, even *nice* people like me, because we're "parasites." Okay strictly speaking we are, we get paid for being unable to work, but that's not a bad thing: aren't you glad you never had to work with or live next door to me? They pay me to stay out of your way, and I'm inclined to do that anyway. What might happen if someone like me couldn't avoid working alongside people like you? Does "going postal" ring a bell? Or maybe you'd make a person totally hate normies before s/he became legally adult: the problem is Harris & Klebold thought on too small a scale. Shoot up their own school? What good would that do? You'd do much better to, say, go berserk at a MAGA occasion. Gabby Clifford might've been the wrong target, but at least she was in the right direction: an anti-human politician. (Is there any other kind?)
It could very well be that because I had no children y'all lost out on a chance to declare "Marshall Law"[sic]. If you feel deprived by that you should just kill yourself.
So. Does it show that I'm no longer very attached to life? These days I'd rather merge with he Emptiness. There's nothing out there for me: the bad Normies have taken power, and the good Normies can't stop them. One way or another I am done for. Your taxes won't have to support me much longer. All I ask is that y'all give me a chance to know it wasn't all for nothing, that I am still capable of enjoying life among you. Even maybe more capable of that than I usually was, because I'd rather get what good I can out of life than argue with anybody. Me, 'TheDavid(TM)'. That cranky old troll. I just want to have fun on my way out. Have "mystical" experiences at the beach, find opportunities to know my political positions were the best choice, get all blissed out because a puppy "attacks" me with a display of affection (remember, bonobos), find out that my sense of direction is kind of off but I can still function in the world, things like that. I don't plan on doing anything a good person would disapprove of. All I ask for, really, is a few months of mercy. Then you'll go on to better things. I have earned it, haven't I? Look at all the harm I could have done, but chose not to do. Did you know I chose not to go into politics? Can you picture me a Senator, or worse yet on your local city council? Just a summer to love, so to speak. Just one. For a change. "I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion."
